Relationship Brain Chemistry – Giving Less and Getting More From Him
Have you ever wondered how to get more help from your partner? Most women today do not understand that by giving less and letting him meet her needs, she is actually reducing his stress. I am going to teach you a few tips that may help a woman learn this technique that giving less will actually get you more. Specifically I am going to talk about how to make him feel successful in helping.
This technique of giving less and getting more is a hard concept for most women to comprehend. But I implore you to give it a try. Try letting him do things for you and show appreciation for everything that he does. This means it is really important to not criticize his efforts, but to show appreciation for what he did. It is critical to remember that his effort may not produce the same results as yours.
The fact of the matter is that he tried. If you praise his effort rather than criticize his outcome, you just may be more likely to get help in the future. When he feels his efforts are appreciated, this builds his testosterone. Building his confidence that he can do things in a way that satisfies you will usually encourage him to do more for you. A man gets more pleasure out of knowing he has made his partner happy and fulfilled, than he does if you have made him happy.
A woman’s stress is reduced when she feels her partner has taken action in supporting her, as this increases her hormone oxytocin. But with a man the opposite is true. A man’s stress is reduced when he feels successful in meeting his partner’s needs, as this increases his testosterone. So if she leaves some things off of her to do list and allows him to do some of them, they both feel less stressed. She feels less overwhelmed by her never-ending list of to do’s because she has given some away. He feels less stressed, because he knows he is helping his partner and that she is going to be happy with him for helping her.
You may find that by giving less to him and allowing him to help fulfill your needs, you both feel less stressed. This may enhance your relationship in many ways. When both partners have healthier brain chemistry, they will tend to have a healthier relationship. Keeping both partners less stressed and happier may just bring back that spark that was once there in the beginning of the relationship. And at the very least, may cause a new spark with a newfound happiness with one another and a sense of fulfillment that hadn’t been there before.